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But Brateman says we should be careful about making that assumption - which is based on a mostly outdated stereotype - and about using mocking terms such as opportunists, cougars, gold-diggers. Silva explains that there are four main factors that affect the health of a relationship, regardless of the age difference: Addressing where each person stands on these issues and accepting or compromising on differences as needed is key, she adds. Brateman agrees, remarking that typically the conversation revolves around whether a younger woman can handle a relationship with an older man, or vice versa - but that issue misses the point.